Talk Show Host

Um ok so we hit #4 on the SoundCloud Top 50 Alternative Rock list, just above Panic! At The Disco and just below Lil Peep, and THAT, my friends, is going straight into the next press release, 100%.

Hey Quilter Labs one of our band cats is a huge fan of your boxes for the Pro Block 200 and she’s wondering if she can get a sponsorship?

OF COURSE HE DOES

folks folks folks.

Give the fascist Christian right an inch and of course they’ll take a round trip to the fucking moon. We’ve ushered to power a government that has already proven it will base policy decisions on a refusal to understand or empathize with anything they don’t understand.

I’m sure we are preaching to the choir here, but this is just insane.

anyway our photoshop got liked by @jannarden and retweeted by a former canadian idol judge and also reposted by @huffpostcanada so my friends we have truly hit the big leagues and also could someone please give us a bunch of money to record our album anyway the internet is weird have a nice day

Hey we fixed that Maclean's cover for y’all!

The man with the second best bass tone in the city and the first best t-shirt. Isaac of Sixteen Scandals repping the eleventh or twelfth most okayest band of Toronto at the Bovine last night! And he also played pretty well, too.

ME: i really should do some work to make up for the fact that i played guitar all day
ALSO ME: do i still know how to program in gw-basic
ALSO ALSO ME: no

tfw when you spend $220 to get your favourite blackstar guitar cabinet fixed and you lug it all the way back to the jam space for practice and you play it for about twelve seconds and then your marshall amp head dies and you have to lug IT to the repair shop now and then your bass player buys you ice cream to cheer you up and it totally works

:fire emoji:

Heyyyyy the split is up on Spotify now! Check out our two new songs on the latest split from PCT Musique and you could win a hundred million dollars! No you can’t why do I keep saying this ugh

-> https://open.spotify.com/album/40th4hH8F7SeOeKVgPfXZF?si=Q1AMa80fR5i-QWvnDmisPg

🎵I’ve got the Dead Speaker Cabinet Bluuuueeees🎵. “I Hate Men” is up near 14,000 listens on Spotify and we STILL have no roadies to wheel this thing to the repair shop for us. What even the heck

OH GEEZ IMPORTANT REMINDER! This Monday! The DelRay Music Lounge hosts us and a bunch of other bands for only ten stinkin’ bux at the door, or $6 in advance!

RSVP IMMEDIATELY: https://www.facebook.com/events/297331747537904/

our hearts are with survivors today and every day - those who speak out, those who need to stay silent, and those anywhere in between. we believe you.

my fellow dudes: can you imagine being grilled in front of the entire world like this? anyway, don't worry about it. you never will be.

66% of our band doesn’t even drink beer but we are already planning our trip to the 11th edition of Beau's All Natural Brewing Co. Oktoberfest in 2019. Thanks to all our buds old and new for the unforgettable weekend. Now please join us in praying that Ship of Fools got drunk enough to sleep soundly in their van since the tornado ate their darn tent. 🙏

that. was. a. day. DEEP BREATH: a drive through downtown montreal in the pouring rain. tornado warnings during sound check on an outdoor stage in rural ontario. actual tornadoes as soon as we start our set. we get shut down by the cops. there’s a three-hour wait in a large barn with a few hundred fellow weather refugees while dr. praetorius from “jesus christ vampire hunter” (look it up) does incredible/shirtless 80s karaoke in the back and i try to act casual standing next to jonathan torrens. loud, ceaseless, pummeling rain. cancelled sets. cancelled activities. wet, abandoned equipment. mud. sooo much mud. then, of course, finally: the moon. stars. a clearing breeze. the weather refugees emerge. The Flatliners rip a half hour set on the black forest stage, technically a consolation prize but more like an opening ceremony. an after party at the windsor tavern: we get to finish the set we’d started eight hours prior. the singalong is so loud i don’t hafta sing the last chorus of “i hate men.” Pseudo plays and they’re just the best. vankleek hill is the best. Beau's All Natural Brewing Co. is the best. kevin james (the brewer/event organizer not the mall cop) is the actual for real best. sleeping is also the best. g’night finally and see y’all back at the grounds tomorrow. we’ll be the dorks with plastic bags tied around our shoes. ❤️ ok

Welp. We made it through twenty seconds of the first song before the tornados cut us off and cancelled Oktoberfest for the night. But let’s look at the bright side: WE WERE OBJECTIVELY THE BEST BAND AT OKTOBERFEST TODAY! And please keep your snarky “also the worst” comments to yourself cuz I’m super depressed right now.

OHMYGOSH band sister Kitty Kate Confections made some band cat macarons for the PunkOttawa Flea Market this weekend and we made the cut!! Come see us at Beau's All Natural Brewing Co. Oktoberfest tonight at 5:30 and then check out the flea market tomorrow for some cute/delicious treats that taste like our band!

HEYHEYHEY it’s our first confirmed radio play for the new songs! Tune into the New Rock Hour on Rock 95 if you’re in/around Barrie or check the internets below for an internet version on the internet of your choice at TEN O’ROCK tonight yes TEN O’ROCK is what I said. Anyway what I meant was ten o’clock. ❤️